And I'm not even Catholic!

Before you get all offended about the Catholic guilt trend in this blog, just know I went to Catholic school, and as a non-Catholic was therefore destined for hell, so I get the whole "guilt thing", in fact during nap time I'm pretty sure the nuns hovered over us and quietly whispered "I know what you've done." Anyway I digress.

Oprah says people can't make us feel anything, that we are in control of our own emotions. Well oh wise one, I beg to differ. Who hasn't felt guilt? That awful feeling of pressure weighing down on you. I don't mean that guilty feeling like you ran over the neighbor's dog and blamed it on the teenager down the street kind of guilt, I mean the feeling of trying to do everything and feeling like you aren't doing anything well. Trying to run a house, have a career, spend time with your family and somehow find time to take care of yourself, its exhausting! And at the end of the day don't you feel like you half-assed it at work, are stressed because the house is a mess, got to spend a whole hour with your family while you tried to simultaneously make dinner, do a load of laundry and help the kids with their homework and now you want to take an hour to go to the gym? Insanity! I swear I burn a few hundred calories a day carrying around my load of guilt. Trying to work two jobs, keep the house in order, walk the dog, exercise and see my husband more than an hour a week can be overwhelming.

So what to do? Are we just destined to feel guilty? Maybe. I know when I'm coming and going all week trying to fit everything in, feeling the stress and the guilt build its not much fun, on fact its feels pretty shitty. So what gives? I can't exactly quit my job(s), the dog needs to be walked, the housework, well I'm not as anal about that as I once was, so its time with my husband or time working out. If you are like me and your partner doesn't like to do the same type of workouts you do then you can't spend quality time together out for a run or at the gym. I know I feel much better about myself when I am working out regularly and its important to me not only as a trainer to set a good example but as someone who has struggled with obesity that I maintain a certain level of physical activity for fear I'll backtrack into old habits.

I wish I had all the answers, maybe Oprah does.  All I know is, it is a daily struggle to find balance between the things I have to do and the things I want to do. If someone could invent a way for me to workout while I'm asleep that would solve all my problems.